Sridham, Nanna's ashram, 25.07.02
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We had the fortune of celebrating Nanna's birthday on 22nd and Guru Purnima on 24th. Nanna showered bliss of rasa on all of us. We all sat near him to hear him speak about Mother.
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I want to write a book on Mother.
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'Yes Nanna, It's a great idea. All the main points which you want to tell about Mother can form the contents of the small book'
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Mainly, Mother should come. The downfallen jeeva searches for Her, just like me. He has no peace. Then Mother will come. I will briefly touch upon my life. Mother will come and take all of us with Her. She disagrees with Krishna's words in the Bhagawad Gita 'Paritranaya . dushkrutam'
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I will travel to Chennai, Hyderabad after propagating Her movement here. This is my plan. Mother wants me to travel all over India with Her books.
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'Nanna, we can conduct an All India conference. You can sit here in our ashram and address the gathering. You can be seen on a big screen and your voice will be heard clearly. Technology has developed to a great extent now.'
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I have a big scheme. I will become a millionaire within no time. I will buy a comfortable 7 seater diesel vehicle. I will get money without asking anybody. My plan will change after two years. I will get Rs. 2 lakhs every year. We will spend Rs.1 lakh for Mother's function and save Rs. 1 lakh.
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Suddenly Nanna switched over to the topic of Mother asking him 'When will you come to My service?'
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I travelled 8 miles to the railway station. Mother told me to get into whichever train comes first. The train to Berhampur arrived. We went there. Many miracles took place there. I was travelling with 6 people and no money. I had the responsibility of feeding them. Chaitanya travelled alone but I went with 6 people. A miracle happened there. A government officer came to see me. His mother-in-law was blind; she regained sight because of me; he fell on my feet; he took us to his house, gave us bath and massaged my feet.
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When Nanna was in Berhampur, many miracles occurred. The Orissa government thought he was a sorcerer and sent Krishna Rao, the Joint Collector to investigate. He came in civil dress and observed Nanna. He saw hundreds of people are coming to him. Nanna and Radha Mahalaxmi Amma gave mantra to them. He realized that they are mahatmas and invited them to his house. By Nanna's grace, his mother-in-law gained sight. Krishna Rao surrendered to Nanna. Finally, Nanna along with the entire family were invited to the Governor's bungalow for a feast. Nanna once said 'In those days, I was a king without a penny in my pocket'
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In Karlepally, the village head and his wife looked after me like their child. He gave me how much money I wanted. One day, I asked for Rs.5000 to go to Sonamukhi. He gave the money and also sent his wife along with me. Those days, women wore a veil. Yet he sent her with me alone; she was also surprised by this event.
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Vimalamma, a millionaire lived in Bombay, her house was guarded by gunmen! She made me sit beside her and made her sons sit down. 'They are not my own ones. He is my child. He must be with me only.' She named me Haraprasad. During that period, she saw some leelas that I was her child; she came by car to receive me at the station and made me sit with her all alone. May be Mother was there with me that time.
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'Certainly Nanna, ever since you came to earth, Mother is with you only.'
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Radha mahalaxmi said that when mahatmas are incessantly in Mother's dhyana, a child like nature shines in them. That is why, when any woman looked at Nanna, who is always in Radha bhava, they see him as a child. Due to this child like nature, Karlepally chief lady and Vimalamma saw a child in him. The chief saw Nanna's greatness and sent his wife alone defying all customs!
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Nanna spoke about an incident in his youth.
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While studying SSLC, I gave tuition to Elizabeth. Her father Mr. Gun was a wealthy man. He said 'I will give you 7.0 lakhs and my daughter will be yours. I will celebrate your wedding irrespective of your religion. You can remain as a Hindu'. I refused saying my grandmother will object because she is very strict.
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My first mother is somebody else. At the age of 12 or 13, she produced milk. Till then even her father did not believe her. Everybody was surprised by this miracle.
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One lady named Vedavathi in Rajahmandry invited 500 people and celebrated a function(accepting me as their son). The couple made me sit between them and fed me with porridge. I was 40 years old! You will not find such a leela elsewhere on earth!
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Mother has innumerable powers. The whole of India can be destroyed by dropping a bomb and creating fire. We have powerful weapons with us to protect from onslaught by other countries.
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'India is a very pure and pious land, meant for tapasya. The mahatmas in India cannot be seen elsewhere. The effect of penance is intense in India.' Anjani Amma said.
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One word has such power! A 12 year old boy gave a curse to king Parikshit. He could not escape! One word is enough. Europe is destroyed, Russia collapsed, America will fall one day.
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As the discussion drifted towards world politics, Anjani amma sang the song 'Nannu maruvabokamma na thalli Radharo'(Mother Radha, do not forget me) and we all joined her. The environment became blissful.
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It must come from experience.
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'Nanna, how will we know that it is an experience without knowing anything?'
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Nanna smiled.
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There is no connection between this and that
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'Nanna, till now you spoke about Radha bhava; you never spoke about Mahabhava. Please tell us about it.'
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Mahabhava is Radha alone; not even Krishna. She can distribute Mahabhava to thousands.
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'Distribute! Nanna..'
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Yes, She can give to any number of people. She can transform them just like that. That is Maha Bhava. Nobody else has this power.
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'Nanna, are Radha bhava and Maha bhava different?'
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Radha goes into Maha bhava! There She plays with the whole world. The universe rejoices. Only She has that power. don't go deep into any other matter except about Mother.
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'Nanna, even in our daily life?'
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Even in daily life, speak only the important points and leave the rest. Go deep only for Radha. Don't interfere in any other matters. I have contact with Radha Mahalaxmi Devi in the upper dham, she tells me some secrets.
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Again the topic changed.
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When there is incessant penance, Mother will certainly come. That is why She told, to do incessant dhyana on Her. The astral elements cannot affect you. One who holds Mother firmly will not commit mistakes. This ashram is a centre for penance. There is nothing but penance here.
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Then Nanna spoke about the leela where Mother increased his life span. He was an astound astrologer himself and predicted his life span to be 52 years.
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According to astrology, I must live for 52 years. Now my age is 104 years! I may live for another 5-6 years, seeing the work given to me. I must make everybody practice dhyana. I must buy a car and travel in four prime routes to propagate about Her. We must visit Kolkata, Delhi and Vizag too! Then I will finish the job assigned to me and can leave. 'Mother, Grant me leave from here. I will come back to You. I cannot live here anymore.' Mother .
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Mother accepted me as Radha sakhi. The previous name (Radha priya sakhi) is lost. There is a difference between me and other sakhis. When we say Lalitha sakhi, her name comes between Mother and her. I prayed 'Mother, please don't have any obstruction between You and me' She agreed. Now I am Radhasakhi. I requested to remove priya (beloved) also. These names are worldly ones. Why should I have a worldly name between Mother and me? I don't need it. There should be nothing between Radha and Her sakhi. With that bhava, I am Radhasakhi!
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I am working for the welfare of the mankind. As long as the Sun and the Moon exist.She will keep me here as long as She wishes to. My duty is to do what pleases Mother. She decided my future state. I will go back to Her. I must go back as Her sakhi.
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We have Mother's marble idol made in Jaipur in our ashram. . Anjani amma had a vision. One girl emerged from that idol and another emerged from my chest. Both the girls were wearing similar jewels and clothes. Their appearance was also almost similar. What is the difference between Radha and Her sakhi? Sakhi is born from Radha. That is how it appears. Both the girls danced matching each other. Such high class dance. I was a dancer before . near Mother and here also. She showed that I danced along with Her and almost like Her!
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'Nanna, that is why you are Her confidential sakhi!'
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Maybe. That mahatma, Purushottamdas ji said that I am a confidential sakhi. I think it is because when She came near me initially, She came like a little girl and asked me to apply oil. Only a woman can apply oil to another woman! She showed some leelas like this to indicate that I am Her sakhi. When I poured the oil into my palm and was ready to apply, She disappeared from here and went there. When I went there, She vanished from there and appeared in another place, clapping for me to reach Her. This incident actually happened. Mother plays games with me, hide and seek! This is the very first game with Her sakhi.
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Nanna often said that though sakhi has powers equal to Radha's power, sakhi is never equal to Radha! Speaking about Anjani amma's vision on 11.09.2002, Nanna said in a state of bhava ' Sakhi is born from Radha; her dance is equal to Radha's dance'. From these words, he made it clear that he is an innate aspect of Radhaji!
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Speaking about my (Rasamani) first meeting with Nanna:
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What happened on the very first day?
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'I cried so much'
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Why?
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'You did something.'
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No. It is an indication. You came back to your belonging after so many lives. That is why, you cried like that.
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When Radhaji was moving in the garden, a rose bud was weeping .
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A devotee came to see Nanna. The conversation stopped. We all joined Anjani amma in sankeertan.
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Radhe Shyam Radhe Shyam Shyam Shyam Radhe Radhe
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Many ladies who visited Nanna saw the mahatma like a child and showed maternal love on him. So many ladies considered Nanna who was much older than them as their son. Karlepally village head lady, Vimalamma garu, Jagadamba garu, Vedavati garu- these are only a few names! So many mothers whose names we do not know are also present. Even before Radha Mahalaxmi amma garu met Nanna, he gave darshan in her dreams in the form or a little child. Even Anjani amma looked after Nanna with the affection and love of a mother. His words that 'because she looks after me so carefully, I am healthy even in this age' show how Anjani amma looked after Nanna!
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Though this chapter appears as Nanna's casual conversation with us, his love for human beings is evident in his words. 'Where there is incessant penance, Mother will certainly come' He gradually diverted the casual conversation towards Mother. He taught that Radhaji, the embodiment of Maha Bhava is our deity of worship.
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'Anandaroopini ..Parameswari'
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Sovereign Mother. You are the embodiment of bhava. You are the blissful one; the power of blissful ecstasy. You are my life; You are my treasure of love; You are my ship of love sailing me forward.
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